Richlist Posted July 10, 2014 Report Share Posted July 10, 2014 1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU CHOP. 2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH ANY FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT, BY USING THE SINK. 3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES, THUS REDUCING THE PRESSURE on YOUR VEINS REMEMBER TO SET A TIMER 4. A MOUSE TRAP PLACED ON TOP OF YOUR ALARM CLOCK WILL PREVENT YOU FROM ROLLING OVER AND GOING BACK TO SLEEP AFTER YOU HIT THE SNOOZE BUTTON. 5. IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES; THEN YOU'LL BE AFRAID TO COUGH. 6 YOU NEED ONLY TWO TOOLS IN LIFE - WD-40 AND DUCT TAPE. IF IT DOESN'T MOVE AND SHOULD, USE THE WD-40. IF IT SHOULDN'T MOVE AND DOES, USE THE DUCT TAPE. My favourite 7. IF YOU CAN'T FIX IT WITH A HAMMER, YOU'VE GOT AN ELECTRICAL PROBLEM. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grampa Posted July 10, 2014 Report Share Posted July 10, 2014 ha ha very good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave A Posted July 10, 2014 Report Share Posted July 10, 2014 Some electrical faults can be fixed with a hammer. 8. Never go to bed on an argument, stay up all night arguing until you really are getting on each others nerves. Dave Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carryon Regardless Posted July 10, 2014 Report Share Posted July 10, 2014 9. If at first you don't succeed use a bigger hammer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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